My husband was abusive in many forms. I wanted to remain married and tried my best to endure the horror and torturous things he inflicted on me. I truly believed he loved me and wanted our marriage to work out as much as I did.At least that’s what he continually told me.He went to jail and got a 1 yr sentence and only served 4 mos in jail and some community service. We were married only 7 months.We got back together.He improved some in his violence. He was out of work long periods of time,which caused much financial burden on me. I lost two homes due to this. My children were very much affected by his constant threats and evilness to me. They would defend me and he would call them names and threaten them. It was a chaotic mess.Not a healthy enviornment to live in. He called repeatedly and followed me then.He would trap me in our bedroom or bar the front door and not allow me to leave. He was never really remorseful.He was deceptive and lied to me and I found out alot after he was gone. The last time I contacted the police he was threatening me son. He has left me out of state and I had nowhere to go,just abandoning me to come back later as if it were a big joke. He doesnt reazlie all the beatings and threats and constant harrassing,what it did to me. My self value. I attended counseling through the VIstims program here in CA and it did help. I would like closure and to be able to tell him what he did to me. I want forgiveness. I want to see if he is remorseful at all? He isnt able to communicate with me on normal terms,as part of his parole. I want closure though. I havent seen him since 3-2000. He was issued a 5 yr sentence and was released Nov 2002.(He served 2 1/2 yrs).I hope you will allow us to communicate via this mode. It would help me get on with my life. I am not able to at this point. We go to court in November to finalize the divorce.

Editor’s note:

The Community Justice Center believes the key to unlocking the problems with our justice system is restoring control and voices to victims. A victim tends to get lost in the shuffle of police, lawyers, judges and court rooms. Their questions don’t get answered and their story becomes nothing but yesterday’s crime.

Offenders become nothing but criminals doing time on holiday. Most never take full responsibility for the damage they have done. They don’t get a chance to feel the victim’s pain and try to make amends, even if that is all they can do. The victim has the key to getting across to offenders. Offenders need to understand the extreme gravity of the harm they put upon the victim and the community.

A major part of the Community Justice Center (CJC) is elevating victims voices so they are heard all while restoring a clear sense of control back. Through CJC victims begin the healing process and offenders know true accountability while learning about the true harm they caused real individuals and communities because of their actions. Share your comments and impact stories.